You too can be a Millionaire!
MONEY, MONEY, MONEY!
I’ve decided to become the next great stock guru. Move over Warren. Buffett that is! It’s been a bumpy start but you just wait. By the end of this informative article, you too, will become a millionaire! Yep.
It all started with SNAP. You know, Snap Chat. All the kids are doing it so it must be good, right? I thought I’d make a quick million on this news. So I bought it at the all-time high (you’re welcome all you selfish people that took out your money at that point. Pigs, every one of you.) After losing $5 a share ON THE SAME DAY, I got out. It still hasn’t gotten up to that $29 high. Huh.
Now I’m doing research. I called my two Fidelity people, my children, a successful stock trader from Alaska, a para-legal, neighbors, my favorite priest, and my two cleaning ladies who always smile and say “Si.” I did not talk with my good friend, Michael Khoury, who happens to be a Lincoln Financial Advisor and Sagemark Consultant because he poo-poos my greedy aggressive unconventional picks. I look up everything. Okay, I must admit, I don’t know what I am looking at, hence the unbiased views from said cross section of knowledgeable people in my circle of friends. (See above)
I write down everything. I tend to pick out stock like I pick horses at the race track – that was years ago. If the horse’s name is Judy it must be a winner. It wasn’t but one has to start somewhere. I watch my selections forever, at least 3 days and they are all going up. I might need to know what’s going on in the world like when AT&T put a bid in for some spectrum company and that stock shot up over $29 in one day! I didn’t pick that one.
Here’s the strategy: Buy a stock and when it goes up 10%, sell it. That should take only a few days. I figure I’ll be a millionaire in a week or two, by the end of the month for sure.
Here’s one, AMAT. The chart shows it to be a good buy. It’s only $41.49 per share. I’ll take some of that. Not sure what the company does but it sounds good. A- mat, like taking a nap after lunch, on a mat. It’s the highest it’s ever been. I think it’ll go higher. How about BAC? That’s Bank of America. It’s only $23.77. That’s pretty cheap. I happen to have one of their credit cards. I’ll buy some of that and go shopping to secure it’s success. I’ll take AT&T, I love them (retired from there). How about Apple? I have an i-Phone. Yikes it’s $147.06 today. That’s per share! They sure are proud! GGB is an oil company in Brazil. I use gas and they are only $2.88 but at one time in their existence, May 2008, they were over $24. I think they can do it again. Go, go GGB. See how easy this is?
Currently, I’m tracking 20 different stocks. I found out today that I can actually buy a stock and have the stock system automatically sell it if it goes down, like 3%, or 5%, or whatever % I choose. Conversely, buy it when it goes down some percent or dollar amount (I haven’t tried either yet) and you own it. Clever. One doesn’t have to watch it every minute of the day. The only bad thing is every time it does that it costs me $4.95. Uh huh.
There is a slight chance that the stock you think you bought is actually not the stock you bought. Put your fingers cock-eyed on the keyboard and MVT selling for $15.59 becomes MCD (McDonald’s) at $143.45. Once you realize you’ve over spent on those French fries, it will cost you $9.90 in commissions to take it out and put your hard earned money somewhere else. And again another $4.95. Kind of like the airlines charging for water (luggage, lunch, movie, and a seat that is not squashed between to hairy men). Not that I’ve done that. A friend of mine did, just saying.
All of my children have stock. Andrea said, “Never trust a company that has those cute little animated creatures like Dumbo and Bambi. “ I lost on Disney.” And I say, “Never hurts to take a profit!” I didn’t say that, silly people. That would have been my husband.
Brad said, “The stock market is like gambling. Sometimes you win and sometimes you don’t.” Michael said, “Mom, what are you doing with our inheritance?” Laurie said, “Put everything back and leave it alone.” And Christy said, “Try some of these, I have. They seem to be doing okay every other day. Remember buy high and sell low.” My good friend, the financial advisor said, “Invest your money in a nice, safe 30-60 day CD. The market is due a correction. At our age, we need to be conservative.” Hey! Who is he talking to – ‘AT OUR AGE!’ Hump. What does he know!
At this writing, at this moment, I am down on 7 of my current picks. But on a good note, I am up on 7. So there ya’ go. I’m off to a good start. The stock market is closed and I can rest my brain. It’s hard work being a great stock guru. Let’s do this again tomorrow, want to?
Written by Judy Lee Copyright ©2017 Judy Lee